thank you Lord.. thoughts on my mind

Thank you God for hearing me and helping me.. AM is taking breast milk from the bottle so now i ask from thee that you please provide in abundance lots of breast milk for her that she may have her fill to her contentment.

 i tried her with formula but she seems to refuse that but i will keep trying lord please help me with patience and help her to accept one of  the brands.. and abdul loved it.. but we will try another...

 God thank you very much. i am most grateful.

 Dear lord the situation in this country i really pray that you keep us together and dont let us split.. as a unified country but with rights to each of the tribes so hat we all have a say not just for our tribe here but overall.. common good and common wealth...

 Lord help me to start saving please  thi sis very important for me that i may save wisely and efficiently.. 

thank you

breaking point lord i am at that stage

here is how i feel right not lord.. rightly or wrongly my feelings are but this is how i am.
 i am at my lowest emotional state.
 i dont know what to do.
 sometimes the thought that you are either punishing me or that you are letting others wishes punish me is crossing my mind.
 if other wishes have been granted and it involves me in despair i implore to thee o lord to please relieve me because you are the only one that can help me.
 if it is that you are punishing me then i am sorry lord and i ask forgiveness and i beg of thee to help me.

i am afraid i will do something i will regret because i done see a way forward or backward.i am short of money so i have to go back to work but i want to go back secure that AM will eat without force, if she wont do it while i am around how can i be sure she will when i am at work.

 yesterday she took the bottle, much persuasion and standing still she took it, but last night i was soooo tired having been up most of sunday night  and she was fretting soo much that i gave her a bit of breast so she could sleep and so could i.
 since then when she was up in the night she has refused the bottle.
 maybe it is the formula milk because that was what was in it i dont know yet. i dont even know i can produce that much breast milk for her esp when i go back to work the chances of me pumping are reduced..
so i am hoping she takes formula too along with breastmilk.
 god in no way do i want to deprive her of food that you have provided for her as her source of nourishment.. i cannot say that i want to do that.. that is not my intention.. i just want her to have loads in abundance.. and if it is that it is from my breast that the abundance should come from then i accept it as her manna and quail as it is from thee o lord so it is best for her.

 maybe it is the formula cow and gate and maybe i should try another brand.. with that is waste and buying other types.. i dont know what to do lord i dont know what to do.. i dont know.. i am at your mercy lord.. i am at your mercy..
 Lord i am at your mercy...
yes it is true that we turn despondent when we are looking for something from thee and we are unappreciative once we get it.. that is a trait of every human i guess but LORD hand on my heart i say to thee that i am forever grateful for all you do for me... i am .. even if i am weary and not in the right state to pray i still in my mind seek to glorify and praise thee.. even  if i dont have enough i will try find something to spare..
even if my rage catches up with me and anger fills me.. i still turn to thee seeking redress and solutions from thee and thee alone..
 i have no one to turn to and i need your help please.
 i have had the thought that i know you are not a bad lord though we humans have bad wishes and bad thoughts.. even with my   wishes which some may consider bad but in my anguish and despair i consider them good - i turn to thee asking thee to grant them for me.. for me the crucial is that i turn to thee  because only you have power and authority and will in my life. i really rely on thee for my every provision and sustainance everything in my life.. that is why i dedicate my children to thee...
 i hope lord that my giving her the breast last night i have not undone the work because the plan is to stop giving her breast and give her the expresed milk.. she will also soon start weaning but weaning with breast milk.. if that is the way you wish it lord..
help me lord help me i need your great help over these my children and the different issues they pose for me please lord help me help me help me because i  feel i am at breaking point and i dont want to do something stupid that i will regret please lord help me because i have no one but thee.. please lord help me to get her to take to the bottle. i dont know baby speak and i dont know how to communicate with her but you lord that has created us you have the will to change every strong  will into rubber you have the say and the command.. please lord help me.. i lay in wait lord that i may yet again lay myself before thy alter  giving thanks that the Lord of abraham has not forsaken me and has come to my rescue

Help with praise

My life is in your hands Lord.. please help me please over this food and bottle issue. For anything to be done You only have to will Be and it shall be. I glorify and praise thee as I ask for your help.. God my salvation and Hope. Blessed art Thou Most Gracious Lord and Blessed be thy holy name..

I am at your mercy lord

I don't have any issues being in your debt lord but I need help from you regarding this girl and her feeding.. She is already small and how you are sustaining her I don't know.
She will gladly suck my finger and anything she will put in her mouth but when I give her a milk bottle she refuses even the sipping cup..I am at my wits end because as a mother I feel its my fault she is refusing the bottle.. I think this is an irrational thought but all the same I can't help but think it.. Some times I feel I should kill myself because I am that much of a bad mother she is refusing to take to the bottle. I didn't experience any of this with AR lord so why am I being tested this way.. I don't have any strenght left in me.. So I am appealing to thee lord to save me before I fall. I am asking for your help to please please please please listen to this mothers anguish and help her make things right and help her baby...
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I am still at it

Dear lord. I am still at it with this girl and it is weighing me down ea h time she does not suck on the bottle. I am at my wits end and I feel like I am waterboarding her and still she refuses. I have highlighted my caze with the hv that came and yet again... If I had known it would be this hard I would have opted for the bottle.. I never had this issue with AR proba ly cos he started on the bottle and was mixed on the two right from start

Anyways it is what can I do about it now that I need. I fried speaking to my elderly neighbour but her children were bottled from start.. I sent a message to mumsnet glasgow on twitter and no one replied. My mum says that my brother refused bottles and he had to drink out of the cup but presently the little girl is being force fed to enable her eat.. +and here we are at 6 months +does it mean i have to continue this until she is one.

 God this issue is weighing me down and i seek relief from you and help on this issue.

 i am stupid and i know nothing and i rely on your race and mercy to help me walk through life..

i have  never experienced this with anyone before please help me god please dont leave me and let me be worrying about this girl..

please.

 at this stage each time she eats i cry and my mental state i feel is frayed and unstable i need your help please.

Milk issues

Dear God, I come to thee asking for your help before i proceed in this matter.
 i have tried once before thinking it would be easy as it was with the first one  - not realising that it may not  as they are two different individuals.
When i tried i had a bit of relief on day 3 and some on day 4 but by day 5 there was total chaos.
As i now intend to go back to work i want to be secure that  she will be fed without any issues
 so i am introducing the bottle/sipping cup again.
lord of the things i admit onto myself and onto Thee is that i am weak of heart - i have no strength - but i know from  thee and with thee there is strength..
 so i ask of thee to make this  easy for me so that my heart can be calm - so that i do not run into emotions  and that i may once again say that my lord has heard my call as he did before.
in the Quran - i came across a passage where it states that You our Lord had Moses made  under your watchful eye. You returned him to his mother so that she may suckle him so that her fears may be laid to rest.
 It is on this passage that i now implore you My Lord  and ask for your help.
My Lord i have  dedicated her to thee so now i call for help from thee Most gracious Lord..
I am at your feet , apprehensive and desolate asking thee to help me lay my worries to rest and help her to eat her milk  either from the bottle or sipping cup and when weaning comes, helping her to take to it so that i can see her develop and i may lay praise yet again with thee

help needed

 i am still here again Lord asking  for your help with AM and the bottle saga..please lord help me so that she takes to it and food. please God help me.. i am forever at your mercy and in need of your assistance and help..

Help please

Dear lord. I am up because the children are unwell.  And I come to you to ask for stamina and strenght and patience to overlook them in this stage. I beg of thee lord because I am weak of heart and I cannot stand to see them suffer. I cannot stand to see them in pain.. please lord give them relief and let them be rid of this ailment. I will implore thee lord right now on the plea of  ayyub..anni masaniya dhuru anta arhamu rahimin... and I ask thy special grace on these my children as they have been dedicated to thee.. AR and AM God you are the one holding them up .. you are the one in charge of them without a doubt you are our lord and sustainer so I come to thee for help this early morning and seek relief and an end to this sickness. Thy name be glorified and praised o lord... God my salvation and help

Mummy

 I am finding it difficult to accept that my mum is getting older and that with old age comes frailty.

how i see her is still as the woman who raised me - spunky,strong and full of life, hearty and boisterous, forever strict and unflinching in punishment.

to now accept that that towering figure is now frail and with much less spunk is difficult for me to rationalise.

i still see her as i see her in my youth - power head figure and it is her strength that inspires me too to have strength and do what i have to do for my children.

 to have sleepless nights and still "wake up" fresh ready to attack the day. 

i guess what i am trying to say is

Dear Lord help me to be a better daughter to my mum, to try not to grumble much but be there for her as much as i can but overall serving You..

thank you God

Without a doubt Lord, may thy name be glorified and exalted always.. thats all i want to say for now..

Dear lord I ask of thee please do not turn me away emptyhanded..

Blessed art thou o lord for you alone reign supreme in my life and in all the heavens and earth.
I give praise and glory to thee for all your kindess and mercy that you shower upon me.
My life and fate are in thy capable hands as I beg of thee o lord to continually guide me to thee that I may be one of those who are fortunate enough to be restored and sustained by thy grace.
Keep me praising thee lord keep me in worship to thee and let me always glorify and honour thy great name.
Most gracious lord keep me focused in thy worship, night and day and let my heart be singing of thy praise.
Grant me your support, help, assistance, blessings in this life and the next.. Forgive me my lord and accept my repentance for my sins of which are many many many ..sins of ommision and commision ..sins that are outward and inward.. Keep me devoted to thee always lord help me Lord help me achieve progress in faith; in life; in work; in family; in circumstances; in the hereafter.. And draw me closer to you help me to worship you better. I ask the same for my children please lord..in this crazy times that we are only your special grace can help them..keep them close to you please do not let them linger before they find you right from now as they are young let them know you, know of you,be aware of you, love you,worship you..
Thy great name be praised and magnified always...
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Ma testimony

Sorry folks its in quranic arabic language ( that is what strikes a chord with me)

Ma testimony: Llahu ahad, Llahu samad. Lam ya lid wa lam yu lad. Wa lam ya kun lahu kufuwan ahad.
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better daughter

the past days Lord i have said that i would come here to lament at how my latest test is going or not going.
 I said i would come before thee Lord using this avenue as my  escape to complain to you about my predicament  and  the simmering kettle that is the  sometimes short-fused relationship between me and my parents.
 but i find it hard to complain to thee Lord because  - of the good books i have read - there is always the part be kind and gentle with your parents,  but i ask myself the question how easy is this to be especially when they so know the  buttons to press to aggravate you.
 if it were another human being one would not suffer the same treatment from them but because they are your parents one has to suffer.
 i have asked thee o lord to help me to be a better daughter, to give me the patience that is required to deal with my parents especially when they are goading me to a response and a response from me( emotionally challenged) will be tempestuous at best..

 a couple of observations i make though are thus
 parents forget that their children too will become adults one day
 parents think that their children will always look at them/their actions through the eyes of childhood rather than the eyes of an adult -
parents should accept their  their actions  to their children in childhood will always be scrutinized once the children are adults
 for example - when we were children we got given what we got given - if we didn't like it or made a fuss about it  - it got taken away and we were beaten.. now what should be our response if our parents are behaving "childish" because they got given something and they don't like it???
As a child we didn't have a choice in what we were given , we were told to be grateful for the little we had, yet parents  don't sometimes want to accept what they have been given.. what should be the response to that.
Dear Lord, i have always said and maintain that i dont understand your laws/life  but i ask that you help me  live life without breaking too many laws of yours..
 i do want to be a better daughter but i dont know how.
 my relationship with my parents is blighted by how i was treated as a child and how i am still treated as a child - some  pent up feelings of how i am being the "fall guy" and  overlooked in favour of my other siblings..
 but what do i know.. my feelings may or may not be genuine  it may  or may not be even valid - it is just the way i am looking at the situation,
In spite and despite Lord - help me to please be a better  daughter and to have  the patience and tolerance to be able to deal with my parents..

thank you

most gracious.. just a simple thank you for everything you do in my life.. for my joys, my ups and downs, for my children and those i care for.
 just a simple thank you to the one in whose hand all things are possible.

Psalm 25 - wonderful prose of prayer - In thee O lord i put my trust, in Thee i lay my hopes

In you, Lord my God,
    I put my trust.

2 I trust in you;
    do not let me be put to shame,
    nor let my enemies triumph over me.
3 No one who hopes in you
    will ever be put to shame,
but shame will come on those
    who are treacherous without cause.

4 Show me your ways, Lord,
    teach me your paths.
5 Guide me in your truth and teach me,
    for you are God my Savior,
    and my hope is in you all day long.
6 Remember, Lord, your great mercy and love,
    for they are from of old.
7 Do not remember the sins of my youth
    and my rebellious ways;
according to your love remember me,
    for you, Lord, are good.

8 Good and upright is the Lord;
    therefore he instructs sinners in his ways.
9 He guides the humble in what is right
    and teaches them his way.
10 All the ways of the Lord are loving and faithful
    toward those who keep the demands of his covenant.
11 For the sake of your name, Lord,
    forgive my iniquity, though it is great.

12 Who, then, are those who fear the Lord?
    He will instruct them in the ways they should choose.[b]
13 They will spend their days in prosperity,
    and their descendants will inherit the land.
14 The Lord confides in those who fear him;
    he makes his covenant known to them.
15 My eyes are ever on the Lord,
    for only he will release my feet from the snare.

16 Turn to me and be gracious to me,
    for I am lonely and afflicted.
17 Relieve the troubles of my heart
    and free me from my anguish.
18 Look on my affliction and my distress
    and take away all my sins.
19 See how numerous are my enemies
    and how fiercely they hate me!

20 Guard my life and rescue me;
    do not let me be put to shame,
    for I take refuge in you.
21 May integrity and uprightness protect me,
    because my hope, Lord,[c] is in you.